1. Shawn - Just shut up. Shut.The.Hell.Up. I don't know that you calling Belle a "slut" is justified. You're just jealous that she got to Philip first. Or that Philip got to her first, I'm still not sure there.
2. Celeste - I'm thinking you could be way cooler if you spoke in riddles..."What once was lost is now found, implausible as it seems that someone could give birth to a baby, realize it was stillborn, bury it, mourn it, then have someone else dig it up and reincarnate it or something" (I still can't wrap my head around that).
3. Philip - Dude. You aren't as bad ass as you'd like to think you are. Oh, and "do it now or I'll leave you" is probably the most understanding and compassionate thing you could say to a girl who's lost her first love to the town psycho and her mother (twice) to fake death.
4. Mickey - Grow a pair. Pick one and lose the other. And stick with the decision. I thought lawyers were trained to think logically.
5. Abby - Wow. So much has happened. You grew up from a well meaning, smart-alecky kid into a bitchy, self-involved, disrespectful teen. All because your father was brain dead and your mother made a tough decision. But he wasn't. Or was he? Either way, I miss him too.
6. Me - STOP WATCHING THIS STUFF! At least until people start getting their act together. I thought Marlena being posessed was a little cornball, but I loved it. Now I just feel like my time would be better spent watching paint dry. At least then I could get high off the fumes.